13th February 2012.


Today we got another midwife, this one is a very bossy lady who likes to squeeze Mummy's boobies and takes me off Mummy because she thinks she knows best. Mummy has a very fixed smile on her face and says "yes" a lot, I think Mummy is ignoring all the advice this lady is giving, it is different from what all the other midwives have to say, every single one says the others were wrong and to do things this way or that way. I wee'd on the midwife which made Mummy smile and said it serves her right for taking me off my Mum.

The good news is I have put on 30g so they can't put me in hospital, Mummy says I have to keep having the formula for a few more days as well as the milk she squeezes out, just in case I go down again.

I have perfected a new look, Mummy says it is my Evil Leprechaun look, I screw up my face and rub my hands together in the manner of a Bond Baddie or Mr Burns off the Simpsons. Mummy has taken to calling me a stinky-stump-a-saurus as my umbilical cord smells quite vile, my parents are embarrassed to take my vest off.

I still haven't had a bath, which is sort of weird as Mummy spent nearly all day today crying because she realised that after my casts go on tomorrow I will not ever be able to have a normal bath, this hadn't occurred to anyone before they were just sad I couldn't go swimming like they'd said I would when I was in Mummy's tummy. However Mummy said she had to prioritise and pumping my milk was more important, she is starting to look quite wretched, it has now been 7 nights since she slept for more than 45 minutes in a row.

In fact Mummy is very poorly today, she is a very white colour and has no energy at all, it is mainly blood loss, too many tablets and lack of sleep, I don't care I still decided to play and cry from 1am til 5am because that is what I do!